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My name is Simon and I have hacked into your site again. It was easy. You'll never catch me.

Old Abberline is still after me from the grave, I see. He never gives up, but he won't catch me, either. My deeds will live forever. The evil that men do, and all that jazz. (Jazz wasn't even around when I did those bad things.) Things change. I've changed. I don't do the evil no more. I'm still saucy, but not as saucy as I was. I'm a hacker, not a ripper. I don't kill (except for Sinbad, my pet spider - but that was an accident.)

I think I'll stop this now. I've enjoyed my time on your site, allowing you a glimpse into my little world. December 12th was the first one. There were six altogether. These deeds will live forever, too.

Remember, Simon Carter is not my real name. You will never know who.

Goodbye, old Boss. Perhaps I'll be be back one day. Now read this:

I went moon-bathing.
I went to an all-night aquarium.
I fell in love with Mercury (the planet).
This is what I did today, oh yes.

Simon Carter (crystal-boy and hack-hack)
  • (Anonymous)
    Greetings Simon

    I've been reading your posts these last few months with some interest and thought it about time I replied. Unlike you I have no grim history, but am just an ordinary man who has always played by the rules and paid his taxes. I cannot compete with you when it comes to infamy and excitement. In fact, some may call my lifestyle dull, and maybe they're right. But remember this: it's people such as I who are the lifeblood of Britain, Simon, not you. In fact, you are the opposite - you drain the blood from this country.

    That's not to say I don't find you interesting. I have enjoyed your entries and am genuinely sad that you have decided not to continue with them.

    Good luck with whatever you do next (keep it legal).

    Anyway, that's that out the way. Now read this (I think you'll be impressed, Simon.)

    I caressed a Christian.
    I seduced a serpent.
    I mugged a maggot.
    I nicked a nugget.
    I fucked a faggot.
    This is what I did today, o yes.

    'Tricky' Dicky Eros
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